This quote bothered me in particular:
“We can no longer accept that a child can go through life being severely disfigured, and accept that as their lot,” said Dr. Waner, the co-director of the Vascular Birthmark Institute. “Something needs to be done, and I believe that every child has the right to look normal.
While I do believe that you have the right to alter your appearance to the degree you see fit to be comfortable with yourself, I can't help but feel that there's something wrong when you feel compelled to do it simply to be regarded as "normal" by the rest of society. What happened to the idea of embracing diversity and difference and inner beauty, etc.? I don't think that having what basically amounts to an oversize mole on your face counts as severely disfigured. I mean, yeah, it may not be something you see everyday, but it's not like she has an arm growing out of her forehead.
They're treating her like she's some sort of Quasimodo figure... she's perfectly healthy otherwise. Now they've given her what amounts to a sort of plastic surgery before she's old enough to make a decision for herself that this is something that bothers her. She can't even TALK yet.
Perhaps I would feel differently if it were my child... but I sort of feel like this is a bit of an extreme example. We're not supposed to, as a society, judge people THIS harshly on their appearance. I know we live in a superficial, materialistic society... but, to have it be a major crisis that your otherwise healthy daughter has an unusual birthmark... I mean. Come on! Bangs, hello?! I kid. Sort of...
Being someone who has never fit the definition of a "normal" appearance because of her weight, I can tell you right now, it's the worst thing you can do to a kid to make her feel not normal because of a factor she can't control. Same thing for boys, but I would argue it's especially important for girls in our particular society. Realistically, women are still judged primarily by their appearance. Everything in our society is making them completely self-conscious. If you make them feel like a freak because they don't look "perfectly normal", make them feel like not being beautiful is some sort of disease (rather than actually being pretty much the normal state of affairs), then you're opening the door for other types of conditions and diseases which are far more damaging and even deadly.
If a girl is self-conscious all the time she'll develop a negative body image which leads to low self-esteem. Women (and men...) with low self-esteem are more susceptible to peer pressure, to developing eating disorders, to having drug and alcohol problems, engaging in risky sexual practices, and just doing stupid, dangerous stuff in general all for the sake of a little self-esteem boost.
Rather than running around pulling their hair out, trying to find a doctor who will "cure" their child of her "severe disfigurement", why not shower that kid with love and make her believe she's beautiful. People are mean, nasty, and cruel to one another. The best way to build a strong, beautiful, fit person who can survive and prosper in this society is to raise a child who believes in him/herself and can RISE ABOVE all the negativity. If you let a child start forming opinions of herself based on how others see her, then she's never going to be a strong, healthy individual. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, right? Let her evaluate herself through her OWN eyes. Not the eyes of some ridiculous standard that our society is created.
Granted, later in the article they talk about some serious disfigurements and disabilities that would make it very difficult to have a good quality of life, like the boy with the overly enlarged tongue. While it's much more difficult to change a society than an individual, does it strike anyone else that the only person who needed a big change in that situation is the little boy who called him ugly? Meanness is a nastiest disfigurement than ugliness as far as I'm concerned.
Even then, I feel like the issue is not that the boy with the over-sized tongue may LOOK different than other kids. I feel that the lack of ability to communicate with his peers is far more damaging than looking unique.
Again, there is the argument that given our society, being physically different is a disability. I really, strongly, don't believe that is so. We should be teaching our children not to stare at people in public or judge them by their outward appearances. Not only is that emotionally devastating to people who are different, it's just plain RUDE. Who teaches their children that it is okay to do that? Honestly.
Like I said, if it were my kid, maybe I'd be feeling differently. However, at this point in time I feel like you're not doing a kid any favors by making them feel inadequate by making them feel as if they HAVE to change. Maybe if a kid elects to have surgery that's one thing.... but I'd be much more worried about the hate-mongering little snipe who walks up to someone and calls him ugly than a child with a deformity or disfigurement. That's REALLY ugly...
