Rugby has been getting a lot of press and attention lately... but mostly the men. There was a lot of buzz about rugby back in March since the US hosted the international Seven's tournament in Las Vegas. And the men's world cup will be in New Zealand for 2011. It is incredible to see an article like this about women's rugby, especially in the New York Times! The women's world cup will be held in England this year in August and September.
(A couple of my teammates on the Roses)
The only problem I had with the article is the problem I usually have when people who don't know rugby talk about rugby: they make it all about the manliness of the women playing. Everyone expects women to shy away from contact, and most sports punish women who are agressive (no checking in hockey, and I don't know a great deal about lacrosse... but just take a look in the difference in padding. Mean wear helmets and shoulder pads, women just have the goggles...). So, of course, there's going to be a lot of emphasis purely on the contact nature of the sport... and how that makes women sort of manly...but there is a lot more to it.
I was finding it hard to articulate exactly why this was bothering me until I read this article. (Yes, it's another Salon article. I REALLY like them, okay?!) Women in athletics are stepping outside of gender norms, and it's often difficult for us. No matter how "feminine" you try to make the sport (by making the fields smaller, different rules, skirts for uniforms...) the concept of competition seems to be something that our society consitutes as a part of the "male" sphere. Women are supposed to cooeperate, not compete. And they are especially not suppopsed to engage in contact.
One of the things I love most about rugby is that we don't try to pretend we're doing anyting other than breaking the gender barrier. We don't just break it. We smash it. Hard. And we call it "smaking a bitch".
There are a lot of women playing rugby who are openly gay; which gives us a distinct advantage over program like the one described in the artile. We don't hide who we are, and we make it very clear that if you don't like it, you can go fuck yourself.
Female rugby players, straight or gay, are open people, in general. The sport, itself, attracts people who are big, loud, and proud. You have to be in order to have the confidence to do the things that are physically necessary. When you're attempting to take out a woman who is twice your size, bigger, and stronger than you... you need to be confident. To fend off someone attempting to rip your head off takes a certain amount of courage and dedication. Someone calling you a dyke just doesn't seem important in comparision. Someone accusing you of being a lesbian because you play a "manly" sport just doesn't seem to matter. Especially if you are one...
Because rugby players are so very open about everything, not just their sexuality, it makes for a very open, supportive environment. Bigots need not apply; you are not welcome. Rugby has certainly changed who I am simply by allowing me to BE who I have always been, and be happy about it.
Another thing I LOVE about rugby is the fact that the women's game is no different from the men's. We have the exact same rules, same uniforms, same size field, same size ball, and same expectations. Male rugby players are not always the most progressive or welcoming bunch... (in fact, there is a lot of homophobia, racism, and sexism to be found in male rugby clubs, I am sad to say), but, they are very aware that the women can kick just as much ass as they can. Whatever is said in the locker room, I (personally) have never been treated with anything less than a professional respect by male rugby players. They respect the fact that they do what they do. And they do support us, in their own way. They may not always be comfortable dating us (and may be upset about the fact that most of us don't want to date them...) but they drink with us, socialize with us, and cheer us on.
Rugby is the most popular sport in the world. I think it's because we are truly a community sport. Tell anyone you're a rugby player in almost any bar in the world and songs will be sung, drinks will be bought. Whether you are male or female, you belong to a big, worldwide family that is welcoming you in and cheering you on. When you feel that kind of love, that unconditional support and belief from others that you can do it... you realize there is nothing you can't do.
Perhaps this is what people find so threatening about confident women, and why we are so afraid of women athletes. Once we figure out what we're capable of, society no longer has the ability to tell us who we are, or what we should be. We will figure it out for ourselves... and then kick your ass.
On a personal note, I am well into my fifth month, post reconstructive surgery. I've starting running again, and working out at the gym. I feel fantastic, and I've just been cleared to start sprinting and training at pace. I practiced with the Roses last night (we didn't do a lot of contact so I was able to get in on every drill) and it felt so good to be back! I should be able to play again in August. :)
I didn't blog much about my rehab after the surgery. I had a VERY hard time with it. I was in a lot of pain and very depressed... it was hard to get myself to do much except grit my teeth and get through it. The surgery was a success (obviously), but it sucked to go through. My doctors are wonderful people and have been very very supportive. I wouldn't have made it this far without their support, as well as the support of my physical therapists, teammates, fiancee and parents. Everyone has been so awesome, and I don't know how else to repay you for your faith in me except by working as hard as I can to get out there and start kicking ass again.
Thank you, especially, to my mom and to Steve. Without their constant supply of ice bags and advil, I would not have been able to recover. Love you guys!
